Losing virginity. What should you know.

Published:29, April, 2020

You are in relationships with your love partner, you are happy, but something special has not happened between you yet. I want to answer the most common questions about the first sexual partner contact in life, which girls usually ask a gynecologist.

When a woman’s body is ready for sex?

As doctors, we often talk about the age of conception and pregnancy rather than about the age of sexual life beginning. The female body physiologically completes its development about 20 years (although pregnancy is possible in younger age, it depends on when the girl starts ovulating). However, the age of the first sexual contact, in my opinion, is quite individual, and it depends on the psychological and physical feeling of a woman herself being ready for sex.

Most likely it is about her mental condition and her willingness to accept a male partner, to perceive sexual intercourse as pleasure, if she knows her own body, understands what is good and what is bad for it. That is, when she can take responsibility for the consequences of sexual intercourse, understands the importance of contraception. After all, one of the main aspects of femininity is the ability to control her sexuality. When a couple decides to have sexual intercourse, it means their readiness, including becoming parents. In addition, trust in a partner – only complete trust in a partner (usually one who can be trusted) allows a woman to lose control, relax and have pleasure.

Most often, the first sex by men occurs at a very early age (12-13 years). When is the male body ready for sex? In my opinion, male body is ready for sex earlier than the female one, because it has a vivid testosterone stimulation, which activates the reproductive instinct. A man’s sexual maturation is faster. Erection occurs at 8-9 years, and maybe earlier. Appearance of the first pollution stimulates interest in sexual intercourse. In addition, the beginning of sexual life is actively influenced by the cultural environment in which a person grows up. In some countries, people marry and have children at the age of 15.

How to prepare for the first sexual intercourse

First of all, you should create comfortable conditions, secure space, place, time for partners to be able to relax and feel safe. Also, it is necessary to discuss contraception, prepare condoms in order nothing to distract you in the process. One should create perfect hygienic conditions – prepare the body and hands. It is necessary to acquire basic knowledge about sexual intercourse, contraception, infection prevention, pregnancy, physiology and hygiene of the genitals and a conscious attitude to the satisfaction of both partners. Such information can be provided by a gynecologist. I have personally created an information project – this site – Women’s Health Care Studio by Elena Gopchuk, which aims to provide knowledge “about the body” – to health through knowledge.

What should you always remember

About contraception – because the first act can completely change your life, making you a parent. Also, about hygiene and prevention of sexually transmitted infections, as well as HIV and hepatitis. About safe conditions during sex, so that there is no intrusion into the space where you are, and that there is enough time.

Myths about first sex.

  1. One of the myths is that it is impossible to get pregnant. Pregnancy can occur at any time if a woman does not use contraception!
  2. Myth: a man may not use a condom. This is not true, because a man can infect a woman if he has already had sexual intercourse and has not used a condom, that is, he may be a circulator of infection from other partners.
  3. Myth: a girl should always have blood after the first sexual intercourse. Quite often, the hymen can be stretched rather than torn, so there will be no bleeding, and its rupture will occur only during childbirth.

What are the best poses for the first sex?

It is quite individual. Classic pose – man on top. It also depends on the size of the male genitalia. The pose should allow the slow and careful penetration of penis into vagina to reduce a woman’s discomfort.

What should a girl do after the loss of virginity?

The usual hygienic procedures – shower, toilet. If there was bleeding – you should regularly do hygienic washing of the genitals twice a day for the next 2-3 days.

When is it better to consult a doctor-gynecologist?

After several contacts if there is such a need. Loss of virginity is not a reason for consultation, however if a girl feels discomfort, pain, bleeding continues, or she just wants to be checked – then at any time the doctor will examine her to understand the situation.

What are the tips for first sexual intercourse?

Do not rush into sexual relations if there is a certain distrust, anxiety. Gather some information for yourself, talk about your fears with friends, a psychologist, a gynecologist. I also consider the love of partners and confidence in each other to be an important condition because this is an important step to unite not only bodies but also souls.


Be always beautiful and happy!
With love to you,
Hopchuk Elena